19 lines
992 B
Org Mode
19 lines
992 B
Org Mode
:PROPERTIES:
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:ID: f632376e-4073-45cb-8299-b3708861885a
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:CREATED: [2009-05-16 Sat 00:34]
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:MODIFIED: [2011-10-09 Sun 12:13]
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:IMPORTED: [2023-02-08 Wed 19:22]
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:END:
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#+title: Answering Machine Message for the Mental Health Institute
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#+filetags: humor public
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Hello, and welcome to the Mental Health Hotline.
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If you are obsessive or compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.
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If you are co-dependant, please ask someone to press 2 for you.
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If you have multiple personalities, please press 3,4,5 and 6
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If you are paranoid, we already know who you are, but stay on the line while we trace your call.
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If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be transferred to the mother ship.
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If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press.
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If you have short term memory loss, press 9, if you have short term memory loss, press 9, if you have short term memory loss, press 9.
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If you have low self esteem, please hang up. All our operators are too busy to talk to you.
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